today is july 25
Sometimes I feel like a cowgirl. Kinda today, yes, kinda today I feel like a cowgirl who moves from town to town on her horse and stays for awhile until I pack up my horse and move on. Except my horse is a Honda. I feel like a cowgirl with a Honda who moves from town to town and stays awhile until I pack up and move on. Wait that sounds more like Mary Poppins. Maybe I’m more like Mary Poppins. Mary Poppins without the children. Yes. Mary Poppins living.
New Title: MARY POPPINS LIVING
I like my nomadic life sometimes. I feel like I am one of those free hanging plants with open air roots. You can move me room to room and I’ll just chill wherever you put me and absorb whatever sun and moisture I can find hanging there on your patio. Sometimes I do mind it though. Sometimes I see the trees rooted firmly in the ground. Those trees have husbands and nicer houses and higher 401k’s, and for sure better and stronger and more strategic plans. Yeah, sometimes I just wanna be a tree too. But I’m glad we both exist. And it’s not as though my roots can’t eventually find it’s ground to plant in. I think it will. Anyway, today, I am a Mary Poppins Cowgirl.
I know the way my brain works is confusing. One time I told my friend Anna B about a metaphor about Jesus and faith and cigarettes. I thought it was pretty good—I don’t remember what the specifics were anymore, sorry about that—but after I had finished describing the correlation between faith and Jesus and cigarettes, Anna B said, Erin, I’m glad we’re friends, but that didn’t make much sense. And I’m fairly certain she was right. But man do I still love my brain. I keep myself pretty entertained.
Right now I am in Atlanta, Georgia. I moved down here in February of this year, and I don’t know how long I’ll be here. Last fall I realized that the only reason I was still in Chicago was because I was still in Chicago. Know what I mean? I realized every day I was continuously making the decision to stay in Chicago, and one day in December of 2020 I made a different decision. I think it was the right thing to do. I have enjoyed my time in Georgia, with me, myself, and God. I’ve had some pretty cool moments of knowing I was in precisely the right spot at precisely the right time. I’ve learned God is the ultimate companion, yes, even pitted against a blue Honda that used to belong to your grandmother. I think over the last six months I’ve become convinced that God created this weirdo brain of mine to write stories, and that I am specifically equipped to do so, and that the process of those stories coming out of me is gonna be fun and strange and backwards and sideways and full of the unexpected and sidebars and pauses and starts and false starts and I think every day of the journey is an important one. Mostly I believe that because I believe that with God, nothing is wasted. And that He makes all things good, even when I do the not so good things. It’s cool that way. I love being a sheep. Some people might be insulted if I referred to themselves or myself as a sheep, but I find it liberating. The shepherd has to find the sheep water, I just get to follow him and drink it. And follow him and find fresh green pastures. And when your shepherd also controls the rainfall, I’m fairly confident he can grow the grass and power the stream that will keep my floating air roots operating at a nice capacity. Wait, sheep don’t have roots. I’ve mixed up my metaphors but I’m sure you follow. Anyway. Today is July 25, 2021. And I’m happy to be here.
